There’s an element of luck in all this love stuff, you know.
People don’t often acknowledge this. Certainly, many “experts” and authors don’t. They claim to possess the secret method for finding The One—just purchase their books or subscribe to their courses and PRESTO! True love will miraculously appear!
And I’m not saying we shouldn’t read books and take classes—of course we should!
But we read and learn for our own personal growth and development—not in hopes that if we study up enough we’ll somehow summon The One into our lives.
As Treva says, “You may not find The One on your time table. You have to be okay with that.”
But even being “okay with that” isn’t a magic trick for ushering in love.
I used to hear that a lot when I was single—“As soon as you’re content on your own, you’ll meet The One.”
Could they have been more condescending?
So by that reasoning, people who met their spouse in high school or college were somehow okay on their own and that’s why love showed up for them? Um, let’s get real—they never spent a second of adulthood alone. How could they have been “okay” with it?
Clichés and platitudes.
The point is, there’s no formula for love. And Treva’s right, we absolutely need to be okay being alone—so we don’t try to force a relationship to work because we’re desperate to have someone (anyone!) around or end up settling just so we can check off the “married box” on our timeline.
That’s why we need to be okay with it.
We delve into this topic and more on the podcast in the You Can’t Hurry Love: Interview with The Late Blooming Bride (and groom, too!)